That is over 10% of the condors in
Love affairs in the work place can be a bad idea, but that is not even the reason I avoided hitting on the other intern. I avoided it because I wasn’t interested in him.
He is a cool guy and we share a lot of interests. That is why I didn’t hesitate to say yes when he invited me to go hiking along the crater of Cuicocha. Things were going really well: good company, good conversation, good hike, good weather, and great scenery. I started getting antsy, however, when we stopped to look at the view and he told me he really liked my company. I told him I liked his company too, mostly out of politeness—not because I don’t actually like his company, but because I never would have thought to tell him explicitly. He followed this up by saying “mucho” with a lot more conviction than I would typically prefer. I responded with a very awkward “thanks” and I turned the other way. I felt really awkward and decided to look the other direction hoping that something would help break the silence. After a few minutes of silence and playing with any piece of vegetation I could find, my wish had been granted and meters away from us flew a Black-Chested Buzzard-Eagle (guarro is the local name…or águila pechinegra). “Mira un guarro,” he said. Yay! A guarro. That is exactly what I needed to break the silence (while it may not seem that way to the average person, I will remind everyone that we are both interns at a rescue centre for birds of prey…and there is a Black-Chested Buzzard Eagle at the park).
I thought I was saved…and then came the worst part: the poem. Oh the poem…
“Can I read you a poem?” he asks, and I, thinking that he is just going to read any random poem out of the book, say “sure.” MARYAM YOU SHOULD ALWAYS THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK! The correct answer is “No, I would like to enjoy the scenery in silence.” As soon as I said “sure” (the silly four-letter word still haunts me) I realized that he wasn’t going to read any odd poem in the book. The situation just seemed so contrived: We were near the end of our hike, looking at beautiful scenery, and next… “Can I read you a poem?”
COME ON! Why do Latinos have to be such romantics.
Before he began to read he said “I hope you understand it.” I definitely understood the part that went like this:
Every time you walk into the room
And I know that I am not with you
It is like a blow to the head…
This was definitely a barf moment! BARF BARF BARF! And if I thought it couldn’t get any worse, I was wrong. “That was nice,” I said awkwardly (you would think I didn’t know any other state of being) as I looked the other way…again! Eye contact…I had to avoid all eye contact. Eye contact is the look of love. A look I am not prepared to be gracing other unsuspecting interns with…wait a minute…I was the unsuspecting intern. I was the prey. I felt really uncomfortable. I was in the midst of silence again. I needed something to break the silence…again. My wishes of silence-breaking were already granted. I did not believe that there was any possibility of them being granted again. Miraculously, they were. This time by an Andean Condor flying no more than
I love birds of prey.
I believed that his was my saving grace. A condor had been sent from mother earth to save me from my awkward situation. It had been sent to tell me not to worry; to tell me that someone was looking out for me…or so I thought.
The condor created as much excitement in my friend as it did me: “Omigosh (the Spanish version), a condor! I come here all the time and I never see a condor. I am so lucky! You brought so much luck! You are so lucky. How lucky I am to be here with you…” and he went on as I continued to gawk at the condor and amaze myself at how close it was flying to us.
Then came the worst part.
He scooted over towards me and said “hold me.”
HOLD ME? Who says that? And it was such a desperate “Hold me.” Why so desperate? Why so awkward? Why are you touching me? WHY ARE YOU SO UNNECESSARILY HUGGING ME?
I was frantic. I didn’t want to hold anyone. “Get out your camera! Take a foto! Take a video.” I insisted. He loosened his grip and started taking a video of the condor. I calmed down as he let go of me.
I invite you all to check out the video of the condor on facebook.
End of story.
Condor count: 5
Weeks in
Time (in seconds) I have to wait before I cringe from a love poem and “hold me”: 5
…please excuse me.
1 comment:
BAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!! only you my dear chickpea would get yourself into a situation like that!
ps. silly is 5 letters. something another 5 you can add to that list at the end.
xo.
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