why i have the best friends in the world!

I love my friends because they always reading my blog. Just kidding (no i'm not)...but i do love my friends.

I have had a couple people approach me about my sixteen-year old crusher excerpt posted recently. I apologize for the cryptic post, and I know that everyone wants to know more...but...a few beers will do the trick. some of these stories are better verbalized than articulated on the interweb. One of the responses from this post was from my dear friend John who has also gotten upset that i:
a) didnt let him post on my blog
b) was featured in a post that made him look like a giant moron because he told a waitress i would not be having any desert because i "just gained a belt loop", and
c) recount stories about us that always make him look like a loser and me look amazing

I am featuring him again...because his response to my post was awesome. John, you are awesome...so i decided to feature you in a post that makes you look like less of a d-bag

From John:
"BTW - I love your blog post about the teen who has a crush on you. how is that going? I think that at a minimum you should require that you sit down with his mom and make sure that he doesn't misbehave. you just want to make sure that everyone's expectations are clear. this could be difficult. are you going to have to make sure you get him home before his bedtime? will you have to go to all-ages bars? will you have to hang out with his awkward and pubescent friends? what if his voice cracks when he is trying to serenade you? what if you are having an intense discussion and you use a word that he doesn't understand because he hasn't taken grade 12 english? what if you want to buy him clothes as a present... will you have to buy him something that has lots of room for him to grow into? what if his allowance isn't enough to take you out for dinner? I think that's another thing you'd have to talk to his mom about."

Yes..these are all very common concerns. I have lost many minutes of my life to thinking about them.

Dear John....what DO i do?